Call me Alexander

I went to sleep with gum in my mouth and now there's gum in my hair and when I got out of bed this morning I tripped on my skateboard and by mistake I dropped my sweater in the sink when the water was running... Oh. No. Sorry, that wasn't me. When I got ready for bed I was worried about DS1 because he was coughing up a lung and I woke up everytime I heard him breathe (which is often, because we still have a baby monitor in the boys' room) and I am fearful of the kids getting sick so close to vacation. When the alarm went off, I hit the snooze bar more times that I was aware of and by the time I woke up enough to pay attention to the time it was only 35 minutes before I had to leave. My eyelids felt as though they were made of sandpaper so I could not put in my contact lenses and when I was trying to fix my hair, DS1 kept knocking on the bathroom door to tell me that he had to tell me that he wasn't "coughing fast" anymore and that he had two juice cups in his room but he wanted fresh juice. When I went to the kitchen to get him fresh juice, he collapsed into a fit of crying because I gave him a new cup instead of the cup he had brought me from his room that looked exactly like the cup I just gave him. DS2 did not want to cooperate when I was trying to change his diaper and he ran off with nothing on his butt and I wrestled him to the bed to put a fresh diaper on him and when I sat down to wrestle him into his shorts I sat on the wet diaper. When I was in the bedroom changing into a dry skirt, I heard the dog getting into the kitchen trash and heard DS2 annoying his brother and sister by turning the TV off and on and off again. When I got into the car and realized (yippe!) that I did have just enough time to stop at Starbucks I heard a traffic report that the intersection right next to the Starbuck to which I was travelling was the site of a major accident. ...and I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good very bad day.